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This morning, I was “Here, There, and Everywhere.”

HERE:  My outpatient lithotripsy is scheduled for next Thursday (June 5) at high noon. I’ll have my 28th kidney stone zapped into smaller pieces.  (Click photo for enlarged version of a lithotriptor.)

LithotriptorMy doctor’s office gave me a stack of paperwork to fill out prior to the procedure.  I was also given a link to an online resource that duplicated almost all the paperwork, but there is still those pieces of paper “someone” has to watch you sign. Things like Release of Medical Records, and Informed Consent to Treat and Disclose Information.  You know – red tape.

The one piece of red tape the clinic would have nothing to do with was my “Advance Directive Guidelines”  (and Living Will.)

Instead, I was responsible for accepting “Policy #ADMB.01” which states “Life sustaining efforts will be initiated and maintained on all Code Blue patients at the facility.”

In other words, my Advance Directive is being over-ridden by the Code Blue Policy of the clinic!  “Life sustaining efforts will be initiated and maintained on all Code Blue patients following Code Blue policy/procedure.”

“Following Code Blue policy,” not my wishes.

THERE:  My mother had a stroke, and in this state, after an oxygen tube and a feeding tube are inserted. they can not be removed. That is how she spent the last six months of her life – hooked up. I do NOT want to go out like that.

The Clinic told me that should I go Code Blue, it will transport me to a local hospital and my advance directive information will THEN go into effect.

But the clinic wouldn’t promise me I wouldn’t be hooked up BEFORE the ambulance transported me to a hospital.

I left the clinic with a copy of my Advance Directive any way, then headed for the nearest hospital to give them a copy.

EVERYWHERE:  Since this town has TWO hospitals, I also took a copy to the second hospital.

This all took me all morning.

P.S.  I also had to stop at my local CHUCK-A-RAMA.  It seems I accidentally left a pen behind during a recent visit with the little old lady I take care of.  She was very upset about the pen, asking me more than once,. “Why did you lose my pen!”  As if I did it on purpose.

Nap time.

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